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THE FINAL VERDICT
P.Krishnamoorthy
The customary day-break on the Mekong river in Kompong Chhnang, Cambodia was indeed spectacular. The eastern horizon with its crimson backdrop, reflected the peaceful nature's splendour in the river water. For Ted White, a Canadian in his thirties, this grandeur made all the difference in his life. He had come to Cambodia as a U.N. Peace-keeper on the medical side, and been assigned to Kompong Chhnang. Since Ted's arrival, he enjoyed every bit of his working in the mission, which was fully focused towards revival of a well-deserved humanity; a humanity torn in pieces by massacres, and yet trying to survive itself from the shackles of genocides. The torturous methods of killing millions of people by Khmer Rouge remained ultimate in horror. More than the monuments of the massacres, like the Tuol Sleng Museum housing the prison and torture centre, Ted had found indelible imprints in every living human face - young and old, of their horrible past under Khmer Rouge regime. They had recognized their eagerness and justified tenacity to survive and sustain for a prosperous and peaceful tomorrow. With least qualms, in the annals of Cambodian history, the chapters relating to Khmer Rouge era, were the most stained pages ever recorded.
Ted had found that history dated back the misery of this country to the seventies of this century. During the last two decades, the country had suffered prolonged hardships of brutal totalitarian rule and civil war. The United Nations Transitional Authority in Cambodia (UNTAC) was established to oversee the peace process in Cambodia. From Ted's personal experience, he was quite convinced that the mission was more a challenge to the world body, and a major effort to alleviate the country from a horror-filled scenario, to a peaceful nation. Undoubtedly, it played a very effective and constructive role to bring a peaceful and democratic transition in the country, besides repatriation of refugees, promotion of human rights, social rehabilitation and mine clearance.
During his short sojourns to nearby villages, Ted was amazed at the strong, complex moral codes and hierarchical relationships with which the Cambodian society was closely woven. He observed that the traditional values had been highly upheld on an unpolluted, religious and cultural base. The family had been strongly bonded with emotional ties and sincere togetherness. Ted was surprised at the families' economic cooperation in labour, and contribution as units to ceremonial obligations. Further, he was impressed with their importance of the interpersonal and interfamily ties in the society which often helpedto solve their several problems. As agriculture was the main occupation in the villages, men were engaged in activities like plowing and harrowing rice fields, and women were engaged in pulling and transplanting rice seedlings, harvesting and winnowing rice. Oxcarts were used for transportation of the produce. Womenfolk also served as the ethical and religious model for the children. Ted liked the varied sizes of their rectangular houses, built in wooden frames with gabled thatched roofs and walls of woven bamboo. They were built at raised stilts for protection against floods.
Ted's mission assignment was attached to the Medical Centre as a Doctor. The Medical Centre was located in an old building in the outskirts of Kampong Chhnang, requiring a commute of a mile from the town. It was a survivor in the various bombings and genocides, and had weathered all political storms. On the very first day of his assumption of office, Ted was able to assess its inadequate capacity to handle patients with its poor facilities in the utmost unhygenic environment. Though the Centre was housed in an old building, Ted was happy that at least its layout with wooden dividers, conformed to the specifics of a small hospital, and had twenty beds for in-patients. With strong determination to reorganize the Centre to become fully serviceable, he directed all his efforts even against various bureaucratic hurdles. There had also been many occasions where he had to nearly fight for the sick against death, and he was extremely successful in saving many. His dedication and devotion to that humanity was so immense, often he lost track of time in the medical centre, and spent late hours to cope with the waiting people. Within a short time, Ted became a saviour to the people who trusted and respected him.
Ted had employed a young girl, as a servant-maid, to dust and clean his house besides cooking and other household jobs. Bopha was her name which meant "flower" in the local lingo. She was in her twenties. Ted was amazed at the adversity's mercy and kindness to allow nature extend to her the youthful teenage exuberance. She was full of beauty as a blooming rose. However, Ted did see in her eyes the turbulent past she had gone through. He was equally impressed with her demonstrated eagerness and ability to learn everything for meaningful and fearless living. Bopha made him happy by carefully taking care of all the domestic work, and ensured his favourite food was always on the table each day when he returned home. Ted was curious to know of her past life. On his enquiry, she narrated her past.
"Having lost my father in childhood in the "killing fields" at Choueng Ek, and left with a legacy of a maimed mother, my resolve to live was not in any way different from my other fellow people. The strong will to survive against evil and hope for a peaceful future, had always been my sole strength. For all of us, the visible directional horizons were the boundaries of the whole world, beyond which we had no idea of what existed, except divinity. The ghastly scar of the country dominantly visible even today, was our maimed people in thousands, who had become permanent invalids, the heavy price paid in the land mines planted by all factions at war, more by the Khmer Rouge. They had no recourse whatsoever for a livelihood. Each home had a minimum of one such invalid to be taken care of. Besides its agricultural lands, Kompong Chhnang was rich in clay soil, the main ingredient for production of earthenware and pot-making which became the mainstay for the survival of most of us. My livelihood was totally dependant on the meager daily earnings as a helper in pot-making; I was also carrying headloads of finished products to the ox©carts transporting them to the nearest markets. More than starvation in the backdrop of the poverty curtain, which we had been used to for years, the constant feeling of fear tortured us to death more than once, more than the real death itself". The initial fun for Ted to listen to her narration through smattered English, gradually turned out to be a tale of tragedy.
It was a Saturday evening and there was a heavy rain. Ted had just returned home, and heard a knock on the door. To his surprise, he saw Bopha standing there, profusely sobbing and crying. "Are you alright?" Ted's soothing enquiry relieved her, and was more supportive to her request. "My mother is seriously ill. She could not breathe. You have to save her". She insisted Ted to go with her. Her eyes displayed total trust in him to save her mother. Ted had seen misery and suffering earlier in his life, but never to the extent he was witnessing since his arrival in Cambodia. This made Ted very compassionate, and he just followed her. While walking through the narrow, inundated lanes with an unbearable stench emanating from their sides, Ted pitied at the most unhygenic surroundings in which the people were living. He saw their homes made up of small huts covered with dried palm tree leaves. When Ted reached Bopha's hut, he had to bend his head to go in, and only darkness greeted him inside. He could hear her mother's whimpering from a corner. Bopha brought a lighted candle and in that illumination, he could distinctly see a small figure of Buddha in her mother's hands. When Ted saw her face clearly in the candle light, he could guess her serious condition. She was having breathing problem as she was an acute asthma patient. Through his timely treatment, Ted was able to save her mother. Bopha profoundly thanked him for preventing her from becoming an orphan. Ted believed that more than he, their tacit trust and divine faith were responsible for her mother's revival.
The next day was Ted's birthday and a holiday too for "Chhnam Thmey", the Cambodian New Year's day. Ted was planning to spend more time at home. Much to his surprise, early in the morning, he saw Bopha at the entrance with her lively smile, holding something covered in a plate. She was flamboyant in the traditional elegant 'sampot' dress, embroidered with rich gold and silver threads. The morning greetings from her were graciously emotional. She had brought a rice cake exclusively made for him. "What a pleasant surprise. Today is my birthday and you got me a gift. How did you know my birthday?". Ted's query was mixed with a kind of perplexity. "It is a strange coincidence. For all you did yesterday to save my mother, I could give only this small gift. Happy Birthday to you". Bopha conveyed her gratitude. She was exhilarated at the opportunity of wishing him well on his birthday. She was happy that her rice cake suited the occasion as a fitting gift.
Since the introduction of Ted in her life and his strong concern towards her, Bopha felt that she was moved to a world of fantasy; a world where she and Ted alone lived and no sign or scent of any evil in any form existed there. There was no day or night, for, it was all through, a period of total delight. In him, she saw an incarnation of God who had come to retrieve her people from the deadliest diseases. She simply adored his disciplined gentleness. However, Bopha's possessiveness was manifesting into geometrical proportions, leading her to become totally selfish and self-centred. She believed that Ted belonged only to her, and to her alone. In short, she was longing for his open acceptance of her.
Bopha had always been punctual for work in Ted's place. But she turned up late for work one day. When he questioned her, she was in tears and explained to him the reason.
It was five years before on the very same day, my father was killed. The gruesome scene of his death was still green in my memory. It was at Mongkol Borie. My father, Kheng Sok, was a civil servant in the old regime. He was rounded up along with sixty other people and their families, on the orders of the local Khmer Rouge chief. All our hands were tied behind back and we were driven to a banana plantation, where we could see scattered corpses. My father was the first to be pushed forward, and forced to kneel between two armed soldiers holding bayonet-tipped rifles. The soldiers stabbed my father front and back until he fell down dead. After the families witnessed it, they were also killed through similar process. Providentially, my mother and myself were able to escape in the plantations. My recollection of that day tormented me and I was upset. It took some time for me to get over it, and that was how I was late this morning" Ted's tears were the direct reaction to this, and his response was profound sentiments to her. Ted decided to train Bopha for the nursing duties in the Centre, as he found her very soft-spoken and polite to others. In particular to the sick people, Bopha was very kind and helpful without hatred or hesitation. He had also observed her keen desire to become a nurse in the Medical Centre. When Ted conveyed his offer to Bopha, she was elated at it. Ted could see her delightful face longing for a new focus. She preferred it, for, more than the job, she relished the opportunity to be with him all through the day in the Medical Centre. She also opted to be a direct assistant to him, and impress him through her performance in nursing duties.
The first day in the Medical Centre was totally a new experience for Bopha. Ted was too busy attending on the patients. There had been many waiting in the line for consultations. Suddenly, there was a rush of people into the Medical Centre, carrying an old man whose legs were amputated. He was in a very critical condition. By the time Ted could check on him, he died. When the crowd outside knew of his death, they became violent and shouted slogans. Bopha had to intervene and explain to the crowd that he could have been saved, if he would have been brought a little earlier. Bopha also knew this old man, as he was from her neighbourhood. Ted was anxious to know the reason for the people's violent behaviour on his death. She explained that the old man, who was teaching their young children, was the only literary hope for them. In the whole neighbourhood, he was the only school teacher who escaped death by Khmer Rouge; and all others went to him for any elderly counselling. He was the sole survivor of a "massacre of intellectuals" by the Khmer Rouge. The old man was one of the 'intellectuals' who were tied up, severely beaten and tortured for their individual views, and dropped off dead along the road from Sisophon. While others died, he was the only one survived and escaped. The Khmer Rouge believed that by total annihilation of the intellectuals, they could ensure that their new social order would be totally irreversible.
Bopha's interest in the job assumed larger dimensions. Her eagerness to learn combined with her intelligence, enabled her to swiftly grasp and comprehend the various nursing procedures which Ted would decide for the patients. Within a very short time, Ted found Bopha performing her functions in a professional manner. He credited her with his appreciation for performing beyond his expectations. Bopha had ensured that the morning visits to the patients by Ted was always with her, as she could learn more on the follow up procedures.
One morning Ted was approaching the bed of Neang Sath, a middle aged woman. He saw her eyes full of tears, reflecting emotions. On seeing Ted, she murmured that if her only son had been alive,he would have been as handsome as Ted, but fate had decided against it. As Bopha knew how her son was killed, she narrated it to Ted.
"It was a summer day. The agricultural labour engaged in the cultivation of lands included many women workers. The numerous palm trees on the land bund provided shady shelters for them. Two women were feeding their babies in their lunch break. Suddenly they saw a speeding jeep coming towards them and stopped. Three men in uniforms got down from the jeep. While one of them was pointing towards the babies and giving orders, the other two snatched them from their mothers, and smashed their heads against the palm trees. The women's hysterical and emotional outburst was heard even at a distance, but to no avail; none had the courage to stop that outrage. While the uniformed 'butchers' were assessing their gruesome accomplishment, the very sight of the disfigured new borns in a pool of blood made the mothers faint instantly. Out of the two, one had survived, and she was the one who related her tale now. Haunted and reminded perennially of that ghastly scene, this old woman had been regretting her survival". This moved Ted fathoms deep in his sentiments.
In the next bed, Ted was checking the blood pressure of Yun Yat, an old lady who was admitted for a virus fever. She was smiling and she had recovered well. Her morning greetings to Bopha and Ted appeared very personal. She looked at them and said "Bopha, I believe that God had made you and Ted for each other; I bless you both for a happy life together". Bopha immediately reacted and blushed; her dimples displayed her blushing very conspicuously. During their lunch break, Ted was inquisitive to know the reasons for her blushing. She replied, "according to Yun Yat, we have been made for each other by God; she showered her blessings on us for a happy life together". While Ted felt proud to be the recipient of elderly blessings, he preferred to be silent on the latter part of her benediction. While Bopha was eager to find his direct response, Ted was very careful to avoid his reaction. Bopha was trying all her efforts to evoke Ted's acceptance of her. To summon his direct response, she asked him on his future plans, in particular to his personal life, which, obviously she thought, would make him answer to her choice. Ted felt he had been trapped and his response was calibrated. He indicated his plans to return home at the end of the mission for further medical studies. As he was conveniently evasive on the issue of marriage, Bopha was impelled to express her concern and said
"Ted, I pray to God everyday, if at all He was to favour me with a married life, it should be with you and none else". At this juncture, Ted had to apply a safety net; he wished to quit the conversation, as he was reluctant to be candid with his negative reply for his own reasons. He said he would certainly consider transforming the old lady's wish into reality at the appropriate time. Ted was convinced that Bopha's love for him, had transformed her to a new life, full of enthusiasm and excitement, as against earlier despair and despondency. During their exchange of cultural concepts, there had been many occasions for Ted to indicate his negative stand in getting married to her; in particular, when she was vehemently discussing it on the premise of his involvement with her. He was careful and determined not to burst out with his negative reaction, for, that would bring down her zeal,drastically to a downfall, and would end up in total disappointment.
He was planning to inform her of his decision at the final hour when the mission would come to a close after elections. He was confident he could convince her at that time about his return to his country. He thought that a marriage between them would not be a feasible proposition. He felt that there was a vast culture conflict and difference between them. He envisaged that any amount of compromise now made,would not work on a long term basis, as the cultural components involved were so strong in structure and varied in character, they could not be adjusted or restructured. As there was more than six months for the elections to be held, he thought Bopha would, by then, become more involved in the Medical Centre, which would outweigh and compensate her disappointment.
Ted knew all the time that he was walking on thin ice on the issue. Her physical beauty had hardly influenced him. His staunch motivation to divert Bopha to a more dedicated and devoted life to serve the community, was very strong. He always believed that any conflict of interests on any issue could be resolved into harmony with a firmness of purpose, combined with a right and timely approach. In short, he was trying to transform her from an infatuated lover, prone to physical pleasures, into a selfless "noble nun" for the community. Many a time, Bopha, when appearing sensuously attractive, had expected Ted to succumb to her physical charms; but, Ted was firmly blind to such enchantments, and assessed only her rich intellectual inputs in the jobs she performed. Besides the nursing duties and related assignments, Ted insisted Bopha talk to the patients and their visiting relatives about the importance of health and hygiene to avoid deadly diseases. He was confident that such messages would be turned over to others in their areas for sincere application. To Ted's surprise, it worked out extremely well and within a very short time, there was a great improvement in some areas of habitation. Bopha had remarkably translated the various aspirations of Ted into reality with her sheer impulse to impress Ted which would change him for a favourable decision. Ted was closely monitoring her progress in the various assignments to ensure her total involvement. Her efforts proved exemplary. He was hopeful that ultimately, her commitments to the community would become very strong to offset the failure in her relationship with him.
Finally, the official communication from the United Nations was received on the elections to be held within the next three months. Ted was contemplating to disclose this to Bopha along with his final plans. He was ambitious to ensure that Bopha's life should be a renaissance with revolutionary optimism for others to follow. An activist with a positive attitude for building up a whole new social system for the people manacled with unity. In short, the image of Bopha should not be just confined to a mere housewife. She should take up an undaunted leadership oriented towards transforming her community to a progressive and prosperous society. During the coffee break, Bopha asked Ted whether he would like to go with her in the evening for a visit to the nearby Pagoda for a prayer and meditation. Ted had heard about the sanctity of the Pagoda and the dominant spiritual life which Buddhism advocated. He decided to go with her, as he thought the peaceful environment in the Pagoda could make Bopha agree to accept his challenging aspirations of her future role as a selfless leader.
Bopha was thrilled at his consent to go with her to the Pagoda. She thought that she had very well impressed him to change his earlier evasive decisions, and sincerely believed that he would agree to marry her. As they were halfway to the Pagoda, there was torrential downpour, and they moved into a dilapidated building for a shelter; by the time they arrived in the building, they were totally drenched. The wet clothes on their bodies exposed their transparent contours so vividly, they could not avoid being attracted physically to each other.The prevailed tranquility of the scene was more conducive to romantic concepts and persistent passion. Bopha's obsession obviously was not blind to make use of such a situation. Her lustful feelings did not fail to recognize Ted's reciprocal passionate eagerness to participate. Her wait was too long for such a moment all these days, and having had it, she would not like it to go by,without utilizing it to her advantage. To accomplish this, she displayed a kind of provocative posture which was too captivating for Ted, and nearly compelled him to concede to her invitation. His craving looks and body language blinded his glorious vision of the future, and acted as reflective pointers of his desire for a physical relationship with her. Bopha was intelligent enough to perceive this, and believed that Ted would play her game. It was a critical moment for Ted, and he was about to succumb to his feelings.
Suddenly his inner conscience warned him about the consequences. He would become committed to her for a lifetime through his passionate participation. His foresight of the prosperous future for the community, would become just a mere illusion. His efforts to improve the impoverished society through her leadership, could just end in a mirage. At last, Ted was strong enough to resist his temptation. He realized his momentary weakness and walked out of the building. Bopha followed him. Both had strong guilty feelings, well reflected in their expressions. Immersed in total silence, they decided to continue their earlier errand to visit the Pagoda.
In the Pagoda, Bopha preferred to be left alone for her meditation and prayer. Ted was taken round by a monk, who explained to him the various facilities provided by the Pagoda for their followers. The traditional simple outfit of the monks and the ancient architectural grandeur in the Pagoda added more tranquility for the prayers. On his visiting the Pagoda, Ted was convinced how important the codes of selfªdiscipline were for any faith to be followed. While they were returning, both Bopha and Ted maintained their silence. Bopha was feeling ashamed of her behaviour in the ruined building. She was longing to apologize to Ted for whatever happened there. She was only pondering how to initiate a conversation with him, as, she was very embarrassed even to face him.
After their rendezvous in the building, Ted weighed the pros and cons of his decision against marrying her. With his negative response, he could think of a drastic development in Bopha's receding to the earlier state of despondency. He had realized that her social involvement would not offset or compensate her disappointment in her personal life. From Bopha's side, at every given opportunity, she confirmed her strong desire to be his wife, and followed it up with frequent impressive responses. It was only Ted who wished otherwise. But Ted had also developed a concern for her from the beginning, and suddenly he was not willing to be blind to such a feeling. He was recollecting her earlier words that she would pray to God everyday for a married life only with him. Ted knew that by these words she meant clearly that in the event of his refusing to marry her, she would spend rest of her life alone. After appraising all factors, Ted was finally convinced that he should marry her. His apprehension of cultural differences between them did dominate in his mind; but, he was prepared to live with them. However, this was leading him to two options, either to stay for some more time in that province after their marriage, when the Centre could be managed by somebody trained, or, to return to his country with Bopha without any concern for the Centre's future. But he was averse to the latter, as he hated to be so selfish. Bopha finally settled her scores with him through an open apology for whatever happened in the building. This was helpful to break the impasse of silence between them.
When he disclosed his decision to marry her, she could not believe it. She thought for a moment that some miracle was happening. She was puzzled with a new feeling full of excitement and exhilaration. But Ted was equally concerned regarding the future of the Medical Centre. He wanted her to find a suitable alternate to handle her duties. Bopha was prepared to comply with any of Ted's request, so far as, it ensured her becoming a part of his life. The next two weeks in their life were full of romantic preludes. More than Ted, Bopha was in a dream world of her future life with Ted. Her interest and involvement in the Centre as well as the community had picked up unprecedented momentum. She was also hastening the process of identifying a suitable person to be trained from her community. In short, she was longing to go to Canada with Ted.
It was a Friday evening. Bopha and Ted had finished their duties early for the day, and were ready to return home. At the entrance, Bopha saw a middle aged man coming very fast towards her. He stopped and informed her that his father was very seriously sick and he could not be brought to the Centre from their village. He insisted that Ted should come and save him. Ted agreed to go with him along with Bopha. The visitor had come with his vehicle to take them. Bopha was jubilant as the travel would provide her with opportunity for intimate time with Ted. After nearly an hour's journey, they were able to reach the village. The patient was an old man,suffering from acute pneumonia. Ted gave the antibiotics and his condition stabilized. Ted advised on the follow up procedures and provided them with the required medicines for speedy recovery.
By the time Ted and Bopha began their return journey, it was late in the evening. The setting sun was getting down fast into the dark clouds. Bopha was looking forward for the nocturnal journey, as she could enjoy again the feeling of togetherness with Ted. En route, Bopha saw a rose garden on the side of the road. The roses were varied in color and distinctly bright even in the partial darkness. Bopha could not resist her temptation to give a beautiful rose to Ted with her love. It was more an impelling urge within her, insisting to acknowledge Ted with such a gift for his benevolence. Bopha wanted the vehicle to be stopped in spite of Ted's warning that it was already late to return. But she assured Ted that she would be back immediately. She got down from the vehicle and walked the distance to the rose garden. She was attracted towards a large red rose at the far end. She was reaching to get it. It was already dark and Ted could hardly see her inside the garden. Suddenly, Ted heard a loud explosion from the garden side. He was shocked and rushed to the spot, only to find Bopha had stepped on a live landmine, which exploded instantly and killed her.
When Ted recovered from the terrible shock, he could see the community crowd with tearful eyes and folded hands coming towards him. They were looking at him as the only ray of hope after Bopha, and pleaded for his stay with them to continue his services. From the beginning, Ted was dreaming of Bopha's leadership role in the future of the community; later, he had to reconcile to give her a life, which she was longing for, with him; but it was a providential final verdict that he had to take over the mission without her.
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