The
Point of Return
- P.Krishnamoorthy
The setting sun was finishing
the day’s work, leaving the golden sky to
welcome the silvery moon. From the
balcony of her apartment Shilpa was enjoying the scene of a group of birds in the sky returning
home. The birds were flying in a unique and disciplined formation. They do not speak nor make any
sign language to understand each other
but they are united in the strict sense of the term unlike the human kind. While
the spectacle was quite occupying Shilpa’s
mind, she was thinking over her intended marriage next week. She was an optimist but at same time she was
an opportunist with excitement and aspirations.. She believed in her dogma that
an opportunist only could make quick progress in life. She even terminated her earlier
love affair with Ravi to come to America.
It was in August four years
before Shilpa landed on the American soil in Chicago after her marriage with
Sushil in India. It was only an arranged marriage by the families. Yet there
was absolute understanding between them. Sushil was working on a decent salary in an American firm. There was never a storm in their life to
weather through and they had all fun and happiness. Weekends were busy in
socialising parties.
One night Sushil and Shilpa
were returning from a party and Sushil felt uneasy in his breathing. Next
morning Shilpa took him to the hospital. After many tests the doctors’ final
diagnosis revealed that he had leukemia and he would not live more than six
months. It was a shock to both of them. Sushil was young in age and he was in
better heath all the time. Finally the storm had come and both had to face it.
More than Sushil, Shilpa was more concerned about her future. She even thought
she could have married Ravi and be with their kith and kin in India. The fun
and joy prevailed all along in their home had become a history. Adding fuel to fire, Sushil was laid off in
his job. This came as a rude shock to Shilpa. She started ignoring him. Sushil observed her total indifference
towards him but he was helpless in
countering her due to his current health status. Sushil was counting the days
in the shadow of death. He later found that she was thinking of marriage again for
her future; but with whom was bothering
her.
It was a Saturday morning.
Sushil and Shilpa were having their breakfast when there was a telephone call. Shilpa picked up the
phone. The caller did not identify his
name but simply said “How are you Shilpa?”. The voice was very
familiar to her but she could not
recollect the person immediately.“It is quite long before we met each other. That is why you could not remember
me” again the caller spoke to her. “Who is this?” Shilpa continued her talk,
“Your old friend Ravi from Bomby”. Shilpa’s face gleamed with joy. When she was
thinking about marriage again and was trying to find a suitable person, Ravi’s call
came very handy to her, “Hei! What a
surprise you’re here. Why don’t you come down to my place?’ Shilpa was jubilant
in inviting him to her home. Sushil did observe
the happy impact of the call on Shilpa’s face. “Sushil! Ravi my old college mate from Bombay
had come here on a job and he only called me now. I invited him to our home”. Shilpa
finally divulged the identity of the
caller.
On that weekend Ravi made a
surprise visit to Shilpa’s place. During their conversation, they recollected the old memories and at the end Shilpa found
that Ravi was not married. When
she informed Sushil’s health condition, Ravi was feeling sorry for her. His successive visits indicated to Shilpa that he was still
interested in her. She offered to marry
him after sometime meaning after the demise of Sushil. When this proposal was presented to Ravi, he was
upset and flatly refused to accept her
offer. but gave an option to marry her now after Sushil gives a divorce to her. Shilpa did not
expect such a condition from Ravi, but
at the same time she was not inclined to miss this opportunity. She preferred time to consider
this option. The reason put forth by
Ravi was that his parents may not agree for his marriage with a widow later but he could convince them for his marriage with
a divorcee. His parents viewed Ravi’s marriage with Shilpa after the death of
Sushil as inauspicious..
At the dinner time Shilpa
herself started the conversation. “Sushil! Our married life though short lived, was a
successful one. Many a time at every
given opportunity you have proved to be a good and a kind husband. I have never
felt any intrusion by you in my way of life.
But unfortunately we have to part ourselves soon by the the cruel hand
of fate. As far my future is concerned though you have not so far suggested
anything, I have on my own decision to
marry again and lead rest of my life.”
“Shilpa I could very well
understand your feelings. I do not have objection to your marriage after my
death” With these words Sushil though
gave his consent, he was emotionally disturbed at the turn of events in his
life. After considerable thought he was convinced, he agreed with her proposal, for she was young and she
had to live. He knew What Shilpa had asked him was purely selfish without any
bearing on the good and happy times so far with her. More than this he would be
living a lonely little length of time if
he gave her a divorce now. Instead if
she gets married after his demise, that
atleast she would be with him in his last days. But her demanding her
‘pound of flesh’ under the pretext that Ravi’s parents agreeing for the wedding
only as with a divorcee and not with a widow. Sushil felt very strange at her insistence; . Though it made no difference between marrying a divorcee or a widow, according to the society, marrying a
widow was considered inauspicious. Considering
Shilpa’s future, Sushil had reluctantly agreed to this. She thanked him
profusely for his kind gesture. Shilpa
called Ravi on the telephone immediately and conveyed Sushil’s acceptance of
his condition and wanted him to fix the date early.
Sushil signed all the
necessary documents for the divorce and Shilpa filed the papers with the
authorities. After a couple of hearings, the Court granted the divorce. At the agreed date the marriage between Ravi
and Shilpa took place and Sushil also attended the simple wedding. While she
was very jubilant, Sushil did express his parting with tears in his eyes but
blessed her on the occasion. . He was cursing
his fate, as first it had taken away his Shilpa from him and soon it would take him also. Two months had rolled
by and Shilpa never visited him. Sushil
expected at least she would call on the telephone to enquire about his health;
but was disappointed over her silence. On his regular check-up the doctors informed
him that his condition remained status quo. Accordingly only two more months to
go for the final hour.
After Shilpa left him, Sushil
was alone except with occasional visits by his close friend Dinesh. He was
totally depressed with the doctors’ latest verdict; he now realized that only
divine power could rescue him from the calamity Except praying God, there was no other option
left to him. In his wild thoughts, he felt that he should meet all his friends
and relatives to bid farewell before the
deadline date. He could not think any other better person to organize this, than
his close friend Dinesh. He called Dinesh on the telephone and requested him to
arrange for the party. Dinesh also agreed to do so on a weekend in his spacious home.
It was a strange party as it
was a forum where Sushil could meet all his friends and few relatives to
declare his intended end. But the invitees knew the purpose of that gathering and
hence they could not bring any gifts nor they could exchange sentimental
greetings. Sushil was extremely happy on the number of people attended. To his
surprise he saw Shilpa and Ravi coming. They shook hands with Sushil. Ravi left
Shilpa with Sushil to talk to other friends. Sushil saw Shilpa after a long
time and he could see the prosperity and happiness in her whole structure; her
eyes were bright in their looks and she was in
good shape. “How is your health?” Shilpa initiated the conversation. In fact when she
came in, she observed Sunil. His face was pale with shrunken eyes
distinctly displaying the fear of imminent death. At the sight of him, she
became very emotional and recollected the past memories with him. Sushil definitely answered her with a simple
answer “I am okay waiting the d-day to come”. Though each one felt sorry for
the other, silence remained as the language between them.The party was coming
to end when all the invitees were bidding farewell to Sushil, As the turn of
Shilpa and Ravi came, Sushil noticed Shilpa’s eyes were full of tears. The
memories of her living with him could
not be so easily erased in her mind. She was not able to say any parting word to
him and simply walked out of the scene.
After all the invitees had
left the party, Dinesh took Sushil to his prayer room. Sushil saw a
picture of some saint in saffron robes
hanging on the wall. Dinesh offered Sushil
little quantity of ash in silver container and mixed it with milk. When Sushil asked what for was this
exercise, Dinesh convinced him that would cure his illness. Sushil just laughed
at Dinesh and said ‘Dinesh ! you’re out of your mind. How could that ash cure
my serious illness.” “Sushil whether you
believe it or not, for my sake you
should take this. Even if it would not help you, there was no harm in taking
this, I am your good friend and well-wisher.” Dinesh was more compelling him with these words. Sushil could not say any
word after this and drank the milk with the ash mixed in it. When Sushil
returned home it was already past midnight.
When he got up the next
morning Sushil was surprised to feel
very brisk and no weakness in his body. He telephoned immediately Dinesh about
his feelings. Promptly came the reply from Dinesh that the ash was divinely
blessed. In his next medical checkup the
doctors were surprised to find no traces of leukemia in his body and all their
tests cleared this. They did repeat tests but they had also showed the same
results. While the doctors were puzzled
at this, Sushil was on top of the world. The shadow of death had
disappeared and Sushil could visualise life with absolute happiness combined
with fun and joy. The doctors were questioning him to know
how this miracle had happened. Sushil’s
response was a divine miracle. What the medical technologies could not achieve,
divine power had done it. He called
Dinesh to inform this and profusely
thanked him for compelling him to drink that milk He also wanted to arrange a party again to
celebrate the event.
When he returned it was late
evening.. He felt the absence of Shilpa now to share this happy news. He was
inclined to call up Shilpa, but only the answering machine responded. He switched on the TV and he saw the breaking
news of a major car accident reported on CNN. A Lexus SUV crashed at the intersection
of George Avenue and 40th Street in mid town of Chicago leaving the driver named Ravi died on the spot. Sushil was
shocked at the news and immediately called Dinesh to check on this news. He
could now understand the answering machine’s response on Shilpa’s telephone.
Dinesh confirmed the tragic news and
Sushil rushed to the hospital to
see Shilpa. At the hospital when Shilpa saw Sushil, she broke down and it was
very hard for him to console her, After
she was settled Sushil informed the good news about his health and Shilpa congratulated him.
After the demise of Ravi ,
Shilpa felt very lonely. She was not inclined to meet her old friends nor
attend any social gatherings. She
contacted Sushil often and shared her loneliness. She was reflecting her
feelings of isolation to him that he could understand. She was very much
inclined to know whether he could take her back in his life. But she was
frightened to make a direct approach as she was now a widow and Sushil would pay in
her own coin that it would be inauspicious to marry a widow. On a comparison,
between the two, Sushil’s short married life was only with Shilpa whereas her
total married life was divided between the two.The memories of Sushil’s happy married life were still fresh in him, as he lived in such memories; whereas with
Shilpa, she had to recollect the memories since they were overshadowed by subsequent different happy memories with Ravi. Sushil’s longing to take Shilpa again as a
life partner was more emotional and sincere, when compared to Shilpa’s inclination
to take him was more objective and selfish for an assurance to her future life.
One evening Shilpa invited him for a dinner and they were discussing their various future plans of which one was relating to their
marital status. Shilpa indirectly sent a feeler of her intentions. She was
surprised at his response – “I do not have any objection in getting married to
a widow” . Shilpa accepted his offer instantly. Time alone would decide
whether it was an emotional or objective approach succeeds finally in life for her, and to deserve the point of return.
