Friday, June 23, 2017
Saturday, December 17, 2016
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| (Courtesy: Vector Clip Art) |
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THE
DIVINE
DECISION
- P. Krishnamoorthy
The midday sun was little harsh in the blue skies on that day. The N0.7 train between Manhattan and Flushing, Queens in New York had just arrived in Queensboro Plaza. I was one of the passengers travelling from Manhattan. Along with other commuters, a damsel entered into my compartment. She was blind, and obviously her movements were guided by the white cane she was holding. . She had a fair complexion and a beautiful face in a scintilating figure. I could assess her age from her fine features, that she would be around twenty. The only negativeness in her features was her blindness. My focus was shifted towards her from the book I was reading as she mesmerized me even at the first sight. My eyes were riveted on her sublime beauty. It was conflicting that in that attractive creation, she was ‘imperfect permanently and inevitably flawed’ with blindness.
She was ensuring that there were no obstacles on her way into the compartment before she found a seat. She was just tapping on the ground with the cane and made her move to find out any vacant seat. Probably she should have been a regular commuter of No.7, as she knew on her right side of the entrance, there were always three seats. She was finding out whether any one of them was vacant. Again the cane helped in her pursuit. She gently tapped and found the middle seat was not occupied. She was happy on this success and sat on it. She made her next move to see whether anybody sitting on either side of the seats. She stretched her hand in her investigative venture and found that they were also vacant. She folded her cane into four parts and secured it in her lap. Finally, as she was comfortable in her seat, she outwardly reacted with a cute smile on her face. I was amazed at the meticulous way with which she handled all these successfully without any external help. However, her face was reflecting a kind of dismal sadness with her blindness.
The contrast of her outwardly positive attitude in handling mundane matters with utmost care even in public domains against her negativness, was thought provoking to me, leading me to imagine what would be her personal life. If she was blind right from birth, she would not have had the luxury of seeing all varieties of nature’s splendor and other living things in and around her. On the contrary, if she had the blindness in the middle of her life, she was missing the best yester years including her kith and kin around her. From her gloomy face I could presume she had the deformity only in the middle of her life, as her sad face was reflective of what she was missing now.
I am a devoted believer in divinity and not an atheist. I respect the traditions and connected conservatives who safeguard them.. I remember the saying that ‘all creations are by the grace of divinity’. If that was true, the question arises as to why this kind of unfairness and partiality on the part of divinity in creating some human beings totally blind in birth or in the middle of life. Yet I do not smear Him with such clear bigotry. Any amount of justification given for such negative act either thru philosophy or science were not convincing to me. I am also not inclined to apply the theological explanation that sins committed by the human beings in previous or present birth do get such drastic punishment. Out of twenty years of her life, barring her childhood of ten years, one wonders what major sin she might have committed to get this punishment of blindness. The dogmatic explanation of some traditionalists that the offsprings were victimized with such deformaties for the grave sins committed by their ancestors. According to modern thinkers, such explanations are simply superstitious and puerile.
My thoughts were suddenly distracted when she took out the cell phone from her hand bag and spoke to some one in her lingo. Her conversation was brief and lasted only for minutes. I heard her melodious voice in that short duration . The train was just entering the next station - Woodside-61 street.
I went back to my thoughts of her life. On the contrary even though her eye sight was deprived, the mother nature had not penalized and deprived of her inner adolescent changes at the appropriate age that would include a longing for a love affair. If on the premise that she had one such in her life, how she could fall in love with somebody whom she could not see? Why not? When she could have invisible instinctual ways to know her people and other surroundings thru her subliminal imaginative mind, she equally could have somebody selected as her lover. In fact most of us with normal vision, imaginatively or thru ‘day-dreaming’ achieve their unaccomplished ambitions and aspirations in real life. In her instance even she would get or already got a lover in real life, she could mentally visualize him in her own way. Also, as any normal person would like and expect to have a partner without any impediment, she would also be doubly careful in her limited choice. Unfortunately in this mundane and materlistic world, how many would have compassion and good intentions to come forward and accept a blind girl as life partner and be sincere to her.
By the time the train reached Junction Blvd. station. Some got down and after few minutes, the train resumed its journey towards Flushing. She was very keenly following the announcements and anxiously awaiting a call in her cell phone. Little later, the much-awaited call was ringing in her cell phone. This time she was very careful not to interrupt the speaker at the other end, so that she wanted to enjoy the caller’s talk. Even as a silent listener she blushed and her reactions undoubtedly revealed that the caller was specially very dear to her. Her reflective facial expressions were an evidence to disclose that it was from her lover and not from kith and kin. As the call ended, she got up from her seat and stood at the entrance to alight in the next station. Obviously she was eagerly expecting to meet her dear one. To her surprise, the cell phone again rang. After the call, she became very depressed and returned to her seat totally disappointed. She felt even embarrassed on her outwardly emotional expressions. I was just recollecting the saying that ‘even minutes of separation between lovers appear like ages for them’. The train made a intermediary stop in Junction Blvd.
The conflicting issue was, that while others around her were able to appreciate and review her captivating beauty and smartness, it was irony of fate, she was not able to see all that of her own because of blindness. It was gross injustice on the part of divinity.
As the train was proceeding, the much awaited call came again in her cell. With her face expressed her happiness and she was anxiously awaiting for the next station. At Met-Wilets Point the train made its scheduled stop. She got down at this station as per the last call.
To my amazement the puzzle in my mind as to who could be her lover, was finally solved. There was a young man waiting to receive her. He appeared very jubilant on her arrival; but regrettably he was also blind and holding a white cane with him. With the guidance of the cane he moved towards the train to welcome her. They recognized instinctively and both embraced each other. It was interesting to watch their initial conversation in silent language. They clasped their hands and in that grip, one could visualize their confidence on each other. She was radiant in joy as both walked together to adore their sublime love. The divine decision of another creation with blindness compatible to her would make their life happy.
The inspiration for my above imaginative narration was “The short story of a blind girl” by Mr Stephen in ‘Motivation’ (AcademicTips.com), reproduced below:
“ THE STORY OF A BLIND GIRL
There was a blind girl who hated herself just because she was blind. She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always there for her. She said that if she could only see the world, she would marry her boyfriend.One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her and then she could see everything, including her boyfriend. Her boyfriend asked her, “Now that you can see the world, will you marry me? The girl was shocked when she saw that her boyfriend was blind too, and refused to marry him. Her boyfriend walked away in tears, and later wrote a letter to her saying: “Just take care of my eyes dear.”
Wednesday, September 14, 2016
THE CULPRIT
- P.Krishnamoorthy
It was the early morning of a
Friday when the summer drizzle played
games with the beads of the sunlight and the devotional songs played from the
middle apartment of 'Santosh Colony' in Ashoknagar, Madras. They were rendered
so loud, the inmates of other apartments had a free devotional invoking at
somebody's expense, reminding them of the omnipresence of the Almighty and
compelling them to have faith in Him for any purpose or prosperity. 'Pankajam',
the landlady of the middle apartment, hereinafter called "Mami", had
her looks down the street, anxiously awaiting Leela, her servant-maid with the
morning milk covers for the first morning coffee, the staple beverage of the
South Indian population. 'Sadasivam', the senior male member and husband of
Mami, hereinafter called "Mama", was solemnly peering through the
morning paper with his dirty bi-focal for any sensational news. In the typical
South Indian nomenclatures, "Mama" and "Mami", counterparts
of 'uncle' and 'aunt' respectively, have been in cavalier use, and very
liberally and widely addressed to any elderly individual. In society's jargon,
Mama was a senior citizen but the government lingo titled him a 'pensioner'.
Suddenly, Mami's sight turned towards a police
constable in the colony compound, who was standing near the scooter belonging
to her son, Suresh. Extremely apprehensive and annoyed with a
policeman's presence, that too near their scooter, she had to call Mama for possible
investigation and report to her with full details. As a sustained obedient spouse for the past
four decades, Mama implicitly demonstrated his positive response to resolve the
issue. He just rushed to glance the presence of the policeman near their scooter. "Suresh came home very
late last night. He was walking up the stairs staggering as if he was
intoxicated. He must have committed a 'hit and run' case en route; obviously
the police had come. Let us wait for the policeman's next move." Mama quipped to Mami. "I don't know why you
always suspect Suresh for everything. Even though he was born to us, he is very
smart and intelligent. Do you know that he has been offered a modeling career
by a big company for their products?". She made an odd grin at him as she
was grooming her wispy hair which was spread itself in disarray.
Mama's ego was ignited
instantly with her words on Suresh's evidenced smartness, outweighing his
individual personality; for, after all, Suresh was none but the "chip of
the old block". Nobody would like to have their ego insulted, much less, a
male by a female, and he was no exception to it. "Ah! You talk about the modeling offer he got.
Do you know from which company he got the
offer and what sort of a modeling he would do for that company? He had been offered to pose for an underwear
manufacturing company. This means he had to appear nearly nude except for the
underwear in the newspaper and magazine advertisements. They would carry his
'nearly nude' pictures also. I do not feel any pride or achievement in this".
At this juncture both of them
heard the door bell ringing. He opened the door to see Murali, the thin and
timid teenager and a total misfit to be in the present day ultra-modern youth
world, belonging to the opposite apartment, standing with fixtures of fear.
His scare overpowered and allowed him
only to deliver very meager words.
"Mama, did you see a
policeman had come to our colony?" "Murali! What is wrong with
you? What if, the policeman had come to
the colony? You seem to be scarred with
his presence".
"Yes Mama, he must be
looking for me. Last night when I was returning home from the temple, it was
dark, and near the entrance of our colony, I found a hundred rupee currency
note on the road. As there was nobody
around at that time, I took and kept it with me overnight. Now I could perceive that somebody had seen
me taking that and would have reported
it to the Police".
Down his memory lane, Mama
recollected a proverbial saying " Make hey while sun shines". He was impelled to apply that adage at this
opportunity with Murali for his personal gains. In spite of his old age
physical weakness, he was always sharp and alert to situations. Through a
convincing offer to Murali to leave the money with him and he would take care
of the police constable, Mama was confident to keep that 'fortune' to
himself. "Murali. Don't worry. What you said might be
right. It would do no good to take
chances with the police people.
Possibilities might be that he would visit your home and search you
too! It would be better for you to leave
that note with me and I would handle the constable suitably". When Murali instantly expressed
his concurrence, Mama was exuberant in the initial success of his game plan.
Murali was relieved as the stolen currency note changed hands. He was happy to
be out of it and left the house.
Poor Mama was not aware that
there was an eye-witness to the whole scene whose testimony would attract jail
sentence for him under Sec. 304 of the Indian Penal Code. This witness was none
but his wife. She was very careful in strategically overhearing their
deliberations and equally curious to watch the next move of Mama in the
conspiracy.
Once again, the door bell rang
and Mama opened the door to find Malini, a teenager girl from the upstairs
apartment. "Mama, did you see the
policeman in our compound?"
Malini, while questioning, was not scarred but appeared worried.
"Yes. Malini but why you seem to be worried with his presence?" "Mama, I had a fight with my friend in
the school yesterday and that could be the reason for my worry". "Tell me as to
why a Policeman had to be here for a quarrel with your friend?" "Mama, she was teasing me
very badly yesterday and I slapped her.
She, being the daughter of the local Police Inspector, did threaten me
to punish me through her father. That might be the reason for the constable to
be here. In the fight, she also forgot
to pick up her important text book which I have it with me. I also found a 50-rupee note inside the
book. I don't know what to do now".
Again the Mama's memory
referred him to the proverbial sun and hay. There was an initial ecstasy as
this would increase the earlier fortune. "Malini, this time you had
already done the damage. But ensure you don't repeat this again. God's sermon is
that the moment one realises and repents for his or her mistake, the stigma of
sin on that individual immediately vanishes. Leave the book and the money with
me, and I would take care of the constable suitably. Don't tell anybody about
this."
Mama's strategy combined with a
little dose of philosophy worked very well with Malini. While he was complacent
on adding to the earlier fortune, he hardly realised that all his favourable
advances in the 'fortune conspiracy' were closely monitored, witnessed and watched
by the eagle eyes of his wife. He was planning to spend that money in a card
game, for which once he was an addict. He had to give it up when the financial
resources came to a grinding halt. With this money he thought he could at least
try his hand at his favorite old game. His plan was short lived as his
wife closely followed and questioned him
as to what he is going to do with the money from the two. "Which money you are
talking about?" He was tough as he
thought that will put down her spirits to acquire it.
I know I have been watching all
your activities. Instead of
investigating as to why the policeman was standing near our scooter, you have scarred the two young lives, and in
the pretext of saving them, you have robbed the money which they got
illegally. In fact, you and the children
are all thieves. If you do not tell me
your plan to spend that money, I will expose this to everybody including the
policeman" . Mami was really shrewd
and used her trump card to threaten him.
"Pankajam, listen to me
first. I do not have any plans to spend
this money. But we have to be very
careful in doing it. First I have to dispose of the policeman to convince both
Murali and Malini. Let me just do that
first. Meantime, you think over of what you want to do with this money. Whatever your plans are, I should also be the
beneficiary of that money either wholly or part of it. But for my convincing
them, they would not have parted the money with us. I will be back in few
minutes."
His total confession was a
remarkable success indicator to Mami. In
the colony's gossip group, the latest news was that a new restaurant,
"Archana" was opened in that
area; already her friend, Buvana, with her husband Chandramouli dined in that
restaurant and was bragging to everybody about it. She had been planning
restlessly to counter this. She decided to use this 'fortune' in that direction.
Mama went down to check with
the policeman. By the time he came down
to the entrance, he had disappeared. The
colony watchman Velu was there near their scooter. He enquired him about the visit of the
policeman and his looking at their scooter. Velu said, "Sir, he is my
brother-in-law. He was asked to do the
morning beat in this area. As he saw me,
he came up to me and we were exchanging notes on our domestic problems. Nothing
else, Sir".
As soon as he finished, Mama's glance turned
towards the first storey of the building to ensure both Murali and Malini were
not there. Thank God, as he expected, they were not watching him. Now he could
tell them that he had convinced the policeman and he left the colony. After a successful first phase of his
enactment, he came back to his home and Mami was ready to receive him. "What happened? I don’t
see the policeman now? Did you talk to
him? Was there any damage to our
scooter?" A series of questions
baffled Mama.
"Yes. I spoke to the
policeman and he is convinced. It looks
that Suresh had not stopped on a traffic red light and he was the traffic cop
at that point. On my convincing
explanations, he understood as to why he could not stop in the red signal. He
said he will waive and warn him this time.
Even to tell a lie, one should be intelligent. Only a lie has saved Suresh from police
prosecution." "What was that convincing
lie you told him?" She was more
interested in getting the truth from him. "I told him that I had a
mild heart attack and we called him. He
was rushing to see me and that is why he did not stop in the red light? Mama's
fabrication was just beautiful and apt to the situation. He proved once again
that he was intelligent.
"For Heaven's sake at
least, please stop your non-sense. By the time you went down to see the
policeman, he had disappeared. You have been talking only to the watchman. All
these I was witnessing from our window.
Your guilty conscience warned you at that time, and you wanted to make
sure that both Murali and Malini have not seen you after the policeman left. Insead, they came
to me and asked me about the policeman and I told them that you had already
talked to him and convinced him. That is how he had left the place. Even in
this I have to save you" Mami's counter was so strong,
he could not offer anything to defend him. He felt so ashamed that at that age
he lied to her just to keep his ego up; but alas, he miserably failed in it.
"Now tell me what is your
plan for the money" He was soft
this time to Mami. Being good, Mama
thought he would be given a major share in the spending spree of the fortune. "We are going out for
dinner tonight in Archana restaurant. My
friend Buvana had already visited that place and she was bragging about it in
our circles." After a protracted argument,
they settled at a tentative agreement to dine at Archana. It is quite long
since he also had a full course dinner; the last lavish meal he had was nearly
three months before in a relative's wedding.
After a short siesta wherein
both had dreams about the ensuing evening dinner, Mama was the first one to get
up at the sound of the calling bell. He opened the door to see a
traffic constable at the entrance.
"Sir, who is Suresh
here?" asked the traffic cop. "I have a summons for him. He had done a traffic violation of not
stopping at a red signal three days before?" "Oh! Suresh is my son. I can take the summons". With rays of anxiety in his face, he signed
for Suresh and opened it. It contained
an order to appear before the Magistrate's court next week or pay a fine of Rs.150/-
through money order. He called his wife to convey the sudden setback they had
in spending the 'fortune'. Following this, she hurriedly came to him and she
understood what had happened. As they were looking at each other, Suresh came
out from his room. "Yes. I did that
violation. But now, I don’t have to pay
from my pocket as you got some money from an unaccounted illegal source. Let the fine be paid out of that".
Mama and Mami were startled at
the quick decision made by Suresh. They were thinking that he was asleep in his
room and would not have known about anything on this. Finally the "nice
dinner" and "visit to Archana restaurant" have become a mirage.
Now, the old couple consoled themselves as, at least that they don’t have to
pay the fine from family funds. But this complacency was again momentary as
there was a call again at the door. Mama
opened the door to see both Murali and Malini standing at the entrance.
"Mama, please don’t worry
about our problems. We got the information that the police constable was just
visiting his brother-in-law, watchman Velu this morning. Murali's father, while returning home, had
dropped that one-hundred rupee note which Murali picked up. It is their money and not anybody's. About me, my friend called me and apologised
for her behavior in the school. She said that she had left the book with the
money of Rs.50/- in the school. So I have decided to return her book with the
money and become friendly to her. Could you please return our money?" Mama's intelligence had a
severe test and the proverbial sunshine was short-lived to make the hey . Both Murali and Malini collected their money.
However, Mama's guilty conscience made a
hearty laugh and whispered "you are still a culprit".
Sunday, January 31, 2016
மெளனத்தின் எல்லை
பி.கிருஷ்ணமூர்த்தி
அந்த வீட்டில் தனியாக ஊஞ்சலில் சோகத்தின் சிகரமாய் உட்கார்ந்திருந்த சுந்தரம், சுவற்றிலிருந்த பத்து வருஷத்திற்கு முன் எடுத்த தன் கல்யாண போட்டோவை கண் கொட்டாமல் பார்த்து கொண்டிருந்தார். கண்களிலிருந்து தாரை தாரையாக கண்ணீர் தரையில் விழ எதோ வாழ்க்கையில் முக்கியமான உறவை இழந்து விட்டது போன்ற உணர்ச்சியில் தத்திளித்தார். ஆம்! அன்றுதான் தன் தந்தைக்கு பத்தாம் நாள் காரியமும், அதற்கு அவர் மனைவி பவித்திராவுடன் ஆற்றங்கரைக்கு சென்ற இடத்தில், பவித்திராவை ஆற்றில் முழுக விட்டு, அவளுடைய சாவின் சடங்குகளையும் சேர்த்து முடித்து விட்டு திரும்பிய அவரை தனிமை வாட்டியது. அவரது நினைவலைகள் கடந்த நிகழ்வுகளுக்கு அவரை தள்ளி செல்ல, சிலையாக மாறினார்
பூங்குளம் கிராமத்தில்
முப்பத்திஐந்தை வயதை முடித்து விட்ட சுந்தரத்தின்
வாழ்க்கையில் எந்த வித புயலும் இல்லாமல் அதுவரை அமைதியாக ஓடிக்
கொண்டிருந்தது. அழகான மனைவி பவித்திரா, தந்தை சதாசிவம் இவர்களுடன், வீட்டின் ஒரே பிள்ளையாக, கெளரவமான தாசில்தார் வேலையுடன் வாழ்ந்து வந்தார். அவர்களது ஒரே குறை, திருமணம்
முடிந்து பத்து வருட தாம்பாத்திய வாழ்க்கையில் குழந்தை இல்லாதது ஒன்றுதான் அந்த
குடும்பத்தை மிகவும் வாட்டியது. இதனால்
அவர்கள் இருவரும் ஒருவித தாழ்வு மனபான்மையில் சிக்கி தவத்தனர். இருவரும் ஒருவரை
ஒருவர் குற்ற உணர்ச்சியில் எப்பொழுதும் பார்த்து கொண்டனர். .
பக்கத்து டவுனில்
அடுத்த மாதம் மருத்துவ முகாம் ஒன்று நடக்க போவதாகவும், அதற்கு வரும் லேடி டாக்டர் மிகவும் பெயர்
பெற்றவர் என்றும், அவரை பார்த்து குழந்தை பிறக்காத குறைக்கு
எதாவது மருத்துவ ரீதியில் தீர்வு காண முடியுமா என்று கேட்டு பார்க்கலாம் என்று பக்கத்து தெரு சுபத்திரா
மாமி பவித்திராவிடம் ஒரு நாள் கோவிலில் சொன்னாள். பவித்திரா சுந்தரத்திடம் இதை
பற்றி கேட்க, அவரும் அதற்கு சம்மதம் சொல்ல, பவித்திரா எதோ உடனே குழந்தையை
பெற்று விட்டது போலவே உணர்ச்சி வசப்பட்டாள். சுந்தரம் பவித்திராவின் முகத்தில் என்றும் இல்லா மகிழ்ச்சியை அன்றுதான் கண்டார்.
! தாரமான பிறகு தாயாவதில் பெண்களுக்குதான் எத்தனை பெருமை! சாதாசிவமும் “கடவுள் கண்ணை திறப்பாரும்மா.
கவலைப்படாதே” என்று சொன்ன வார்த்தைகள் பவித்திராவின் செவிகளில் ரீங்காரம் செய்து கொண்டே
இருந்தது.
மறுநாள் காலை
காப்பியை எடுத்து கொண்டு சதாசிவம் அறைக்கு வந்த பவித்திராவிற்கு ஓர் அதிர்ச்சி
காத்திருந்தது. எவ்வளவு எழுப்பியும் அவர் எழுந்திருக்காததால் அவள் சுந்தரத்தை
கூப்பிட்டு பார்க்க சொன்னாள். சுந்தரம் பார்ததில் சதாசிவம் இரவு தூக்கத்திலேயே
இறந்துவிட்டது தெரிந்தது. எல்லா உறவினர்களும் இரங்கலுக்கு வீட்டுக்கு வந்து போக, தந்தையின்
இறுதி சடங்குகளை ஆற்றங்கரையில் முடித்து வீடு திரும்பினார் சுந்தரம். வீட்டில்
பவித்திராவை தனியே விடாமல் அக்கம்பக்கத்து மாமிகள், கூட இருந்தது
சுந்தரதுக்கு மிகவும் ஆறுதலாக இருந்தது. கூடவே
பத்தாம் நாள் சடங்குகளுக்கு புரோகிதருடனும் பவித்திராவுடனும் கலந்து எல்லா ஏற்பாடுகளும்
செய்து விட்டு, அன்று
காலை எட்டு மணியளவில் ஆற்றங்கரைக்கு போகும் வழியில் புரோகிதரை கூட்டிச்
செல்வதாகவும் முடிவு செய்தார். அதற்காக வேலுவின் வண்டியும் ஏற்பாடும் செய்தார்.
அன்று
சதாசிவம் இறந்து பத்தாம் நாள். காலையில் சீக்கிரமே வேலு தன் இரட்டை மாட்டு
வண்டியுடன் வந்து குரல் கொடுத்தான். சரியாக எட்டு மணிக்கு வீட்டை விட்டு
சுந்தரமும் பவித்திராவும் வண்டியில் ஏற, ஏறு முன் “ஏன்னா! இந்த வண்டி செளகரியமாக இருக்காதே. வேறே வண்டி எதுவும் கிடைக்கவில்லையா” என்றாள் பவித்திரா. “அம்மா! இது புது வண்டிங்க.
ரொம்ப செளகரியமாய் இருக்கும்” என்றான் வேலு. பிறகு ஆத்தங்கரையை நோக்கி வேலுவின் வண்டி வேகமாக பறந்தது. போகிற வழியில், சுந்தரம் வண்டியை நிறுத்தச் சொன்னார். “சாமி! நான் போய் புரோகிதரை கூட்டி
வரட்டுமா?” என்று கேட்ட வேலுவிடம், சுந்தரம்
“வேண்டாம். நான் அவரிடம் மற்ற விஷயங்களும் பேசணும். நானே
போகிறேன்” என்று வண்டியை விட்டு கீழே இறங்கினார்.
மெயின் ரோடிலிருந்து
ஒத்தடி பாதையில் கிட்டதட்ட இரண்டு மைல் தொலைவில் இருந்தது அந்த புரோகிதர் வீடு.
சுந்தரம் நடக்க ஆரம்பித்து அரை மணி நேரத்தில் புரோகிதர் வீட்டை அடைந்தார். அவருடன்
எல்லாவற்றையும் பேசிவிட்டு, புரோகிதர் நேராக ஆத்தங்கரைக்கு வருவதாக
சொன்னதும், சுந்தரம் அங்கிருந்து கிளம்பி வண்டியை
அடைந்தார். ஆத்தங்கரையை அடைய காலை பத்து
மணிக்கு மேல் ஆகிவிட்டது.
ஆத்தங்கரையில்
ஒரு மண்டபத்தின் வாசலில் முதலில் பவித்திராவும் பிறகு சுந்தரம் இறங்க, வேலு வண்டியை ஒட்டி சென்று ஒரு மரத்தின்
கீழ் கட்டி, அவனும்
மரத்தடியில் உட்கார்ந்து கொண்டான். அவர்களை தொடர்ந்து புரோகிதரும் அங்கு வர, சுந்தரத்தை ஆற்றில் குளித்து வர சொன்னார். ஆனால் பவித்திரா பிடிவாதமாக முதலில்
குளிக்க முன் வர, சுந்தரமும் அவள் குளித்து வருவதற்குள்
மண்டபத்தில் சில வேலைகளை கவனிக்க ஆரம்பித்தார். ஆற்றில் வெள்ளம் இருகரைகளின்
உயரத்திற்கு நல்ல வேகத்துடன் புரண்டோடியது
சடங்குகளுக்கு
வேண்டியதை தயார் செய்துவிட்டு புரோகிதர் சுந்தரத்தை குளித்து வரச் சொன்னார். பவித்திரா
திரும்பி வர காத்திருந்த சுந்தரம், வெகு நேரமாகியும் அவள் வராதது அவருக்கு
கவலையாக இருந்தது. ஆற்றையே பார்த்து கொண்டிருந்த சுந்தரத்தின் பார்வைக்கு அவள்
குளிக்க போன இடத்திலிருந்த அவள் உடல்தான் மேலே மிதந்து வேகமாக வெள்ளத்தில் அடித்து செல்வது தெரிந்தது.
”பவித்திரா! பவித்திரா என்னை விட்டுட்டு போகாதே”
என்று உச்ச ஸ்தாதியில் அலறி, மயக்கமாக
கீழே சாயவும், இதை கேட்ட புரோகிதரும்,
தூரத்திலிருந்த வேலுவும் ஒடி வந்து அவரை தாங்கி பிடித்தனர். வெள்ளத்தில் மிதந்து போகும் பவித்திராவை
பார்த்ததும், வேலு ஆற்றில் குதித்து காப்பாற்ற போனான். குதித்த
சில நிமிடங்களில் அவனும் ஆற்றில் மூழ்கி இன்னொரு பக்கமாக அவனுடைய உடலும்
வெள்ளத்தில் அடித்து சென்றது. பவித்திராவின் உடல் மாத்திரம் ஆற்றில் கொஞ்ச தூரத்திலுள்ள
ஒரு பாறையில் அடித்து நின்றது. அங்கு
சிலர் ஆற்றில் குதித்து பவித்திராவின் உடலை மீட்டனர். வெள்ளத்தின் வேகத்தில்
வேலுவின் உடல் மட்டும் கிடைக்கவே இல்லை. புரோகிதரும் மற்றவர்களும் சுந்தரதிற்கு
ஆறுதல் சொல்லி பவித்திராவுக்கு இறுதி சடங்குகளையும் தந்தைக்கு பத்தாம் நாள்
காரியமும் செய்ய வைத்தனர். மிகுந்த
சோர்வுடன் காணபட்ட சுந்தரம் வண்டியை தானே ஓட்டி கொண்டு வீடு திரும்பும் வழியில், புரோகிதரை அவர் வீட்டிற்கு செல்லும் ஒத்தடி
பாதையின் ஆரம்பத்தில் இறக்கி விட்டார். புரோகிதரும் வண்டியை விட்டு இறங்கிய
சுந்தரத்திற்கு ஆறுதல் சொல்லி விடை பெற்றார். வண்டி நின்ற இடத்தின் கீழே கண்ணாடி
வளையகள் உடைந்து கிடப்பதை பார்த்தவுடன்
சுந்தரம் சிறிது குழம்பி போயிருந்தார். அந்த இடத்தை சுற்றியும்
வண்டிக்குள்ளும் நன்றாக பார்த்தார். அந்த சுற்று புறத்தில் காலடிகளின் தடையங்களும், வண்டிக்குள் கண்ணாடி வளையல்
துண்டுகளும் கிடந்தன. ஒரு மூலையில் தங்க மோதிரமும், தீப்பெட்டி ஒன்றும் இருந்தது. வண்டிக்குள் எதோ
போராட்டம் நடந்த அறிகுறிகள் தெரிந்தன. வேலுவின் பையிலிருந்த தீப்பெட்டியும்
கையிலிருந்த மோதிரமும் எப்படி வண்டிக்குள் வந்தன? இப்படி ஒவ்வொன்றையும்
பார்க்க பார்க்க சுந்தரதின்
சந்தேகத்துக்கு சாட்சியங்களாக அமைந்தன. மேலும் இவை எல்லாம் போராட்டத்தின்
பரிமாணத்தை உணர்த்தின. புரோகிதர் வீடு வரை
சுந்தரத்திடம் நன்றாக பேசிக்கொண்டு வந்த
வேலு, பிறகு மெளனமாக
வந்தது இப்போது சுந்தரத்தின் சந்தேகத்தை பல படுத்தியது. முதலில் வேலுவிடம் பார்த்த தீப்பெட்டியும்
மோதிரமும் வண்டிக்குள் வந்திருப்பது இருவர் கைகலப்புக்கு முக்கிய சாட்சியங்கள். ஆற்றில் பவித்திராவின் உடல் மிதக்கும்போது, சுந்தரம்
அலறி மயக்கமாக சாய்ந்த நிலையில் வேலு ஒடி வந்து “அய்யா! இந்த ‘பாவி’ போய் அம்மாவை காப்பாத்திரேன்” என்று சொன்னது இப்பொழுது அவர் செவிகளில் எதிரொலித்தது. வேலு எதற்காக எப்பொழுது ‘பாவி’ ஆனான்? .குழம்பிய நிலையில் வீட்டை அடைந்தார் சுந்தரம்..
விதியின்
சதியால் இனி அவர் தனிமை நிலையில் இருக்க வேண்டிய கட்டாயத்தில் இருந்தார். அவரது
நினைவு அலைகள் மறுபடியும் வண்டியிலிருந்த
கண்ணாடி துண்டுகளின் காட்சியை கண் முன் நிறுத்தின. சுந்தரம் அன்று நடந்ததை எல்லாம்
நினைவு படுத்தி அவர் குழப்பத்திற்கு ஒரு விடை கிடைக்குமா என்று பார்த்தார். .
அவருக்கு ஏற்பட்ட சந்தேகம் அவர் வாழ்க்கையின் அடித்தளத்தையே ஆட்டி வைக்கிற ஒரு
பூகம்பம். இதை யாரிடமும் கலந்து பேச முடியுமா என்ன? . நிச்சயமாக நடந்த போராட்டத்தில் பவித்திரா இருந்தாள் என்பதற்கு வளையல் துண்டுகள் வண்டிக்குள் கிடந்ததில்
சாட்சியமாக இருந்தன. வேலு ஒருவன்தான்
அப்பொழுது வண்டியில் இருந்தான். அப்பொழுது இருவருக்கும் தான் போராட்டம்
நடந்திருக்கிறது. எதற்காக அவர்கள் போராடினார்கள் என்பதை மனதுக்குள் அலசினார். நினைத்து கூட
பார்க்க முடியாத காட்சிகள் அவர் கண் முன் தோன்றின. இதெல்லாம் அங்கு நடந்ததா என்ன? சுந்தரம் துடித்து போனார்.
வீட்டை விட்டு
கிளம்பும் போதே, பவித்திரா, வேலு வண்டிக்கு பதில் வேறு வண்டிக்கு சொல்லியிருக்கலாமே என்பதை மறை
முகமாக சொன்னது ஞாபகத்துகக்கு வந்தது. புரோகிதர் வீட்டிலிருந்து திரும்பியதும்
ஆற்றங்கரைக்கு போகும் வழியில் வண்டியில் எந்த கேள்விக்கும் பவித்திராவின் மெளனம்
பதிலாக வந்ததற்கு காரணம் அப்பொழுது தான் சுந்தரதிற்கு புரிந்தது. மேலும் வண்டியில்
பவித்திரா சுந்தரத்தை விட்டு சற்று
விலகியே அவர் மேல் படாமல் உட்கார்ந்து வந்தாள். அவரை நேருக்கு நேர் பார்ப்பதையும்
தவிர்த்தாள். போராட்டத்தில் பவித்திரா
வேலுவிடம் ஒரு வேளை தோற்று போயிருப்பாளோ? நினைவலைகளில் இந்த எண்ணம்
சுந்தரத்தை மன வலியால் கொடூரமாக தாக்கின..
இருவரின் கைகலப்பில் உடைந்த கண்ணாடி
வளையல்களால் ஏற்பட்ட கை காயங்களை மறைக்க புடவை
தலைப்பால் அவளுடைய கைகளை மறைத்து வந்தாளோ? இப்படி பல
சந்தேகங்கள் சுந்தரத்தை வாட்டியது.. அவள் போராட்டத்தில் தோல்வியோ அல்லது வெற்றியோ
அடைந்திருந்தாலும், தன் மேல் மாற்றான் கை விழுந்ததே அவள் கணவனுக்கு
செய்த மன்னிக்க முடியாத பெரிய துரோகம் என்ற
மன நிலையில் தான் ஆற்றில் குளிப்பதற்கு
அவள் முந்தி கொண்டு சென்றது, ஆழம் பார்க்காமல்
தண்ணீரில் முழுவதும் மூழ்கி அதிலிருந்து மேலே
வருவதற்கு எந்த வித முயற்சியும் எடுக்காதது.
இதெல்லாம் தன்னை நிரந்தரமாக அழித்து கொள்ள
பவித்திரா செய்தது என்று சுந்தரின் உள் மனதின் ஆதங்கம்.
வேலுவின் மரணம்
தியாக எண்ணத்திலா அல்லது குற்ற உண்ர்ச்சியிலா என்பது விவாதத்துக்குரியது. அந்த
போராட்டத்தில் அவன் எண்ணியதை அடைந்தானா அல்லது பவித்திராவின் கடுமையான எதிர்ப்பினால்
தோற்று போனான என்பது இருவருக்கு மட்டும் தெரிந்த விஷயம். உலகத்துக்கு அது வெளிப்படாத ஒன்று. வேலு நிச்சயமாக குற்றம் செய்தவன்.
பவித்திராவை அவன் கெட்ட எண்ணத்தோடு அணுகியதே முதல் குற்றம். அவன் சாவு அவனுக்கு கிடைத்த சரியான தண்டனை.
அவன் ‘பாவி’ என்று ஆற்றில் குதித்து பவத்திராவை காப்பற்ற போனது ஒரு பாவ
மன்னிப்புக்காக இருக்கலாம். அதை
பிராயசித்தம் என்று எப்படி நியாய படுத்த முடியும்? இதுதான் அவர் மனசாட்சியின் வாதம்.
பவித்திரா ஆற்றில்
இறங்கும் வரை நீடித்த மெளனத்தின் உள் நோக்கம் சுந்தரதிற்கு இப்பொழுது புரிய
ஆரம்பித்தது. மன குமுறலில் அவளால் வெளியில் சொல்ல முடியாத ஒரு அருவறப்பான சம்பவத்தில் தான் ஒரு
கதாநாயகியாக இருந்து விட்டதையும், அதனால்
தன் கணவனேயே கண்களிருந்தும் நேர்க்கு நேர் பார்க்க முடியாத ஒரு தற்காலிக குருடியாக விட்டதையும், அந்த கேவலாமான ரகசியத்தை
அவளுடைய பெண்மை தன்மானத்தால்
வெளியே சொல்லாமல் தடுத்ததையும் – இவ்வளவையும் அந்த மெளன மொழியில் பவித்திரா வெளிபடுத்தி அவள்
கெஞ்சியது அவள் களங்கமில்லாதவள் என்று. .
போராட்டத்தில் ஈடுபட்ட இருவரும் இப்பொழுது உயிருடன்
இல்லை. யாரை போய் நிஜத்தை கேட்பது? எது
நடந்திருந்தாலும் தன்மானத்திற்காக பவித்திரா உயிரை விட்டிருக்கிறாள். அதற்கு
காரணமாய் இருந்த வேலுவை விதி, சாவின் மூலம் தண்டித்து விட்டது.
ஆனால் எல்லாம் முடிந்த நிலையில், சுந்தரத்தின் மனசாட்சி மட்டும், ஆற்றில் நடந்த ‘அக்னி பிரவேசத்தில்’ சாவை சந்தித்த பவித்திரா, புடம் போட்ட தங்கமாக வெளியில் வந்தாளா அல்லது களங்கத்தை சுமந்த பெண்ணாக
வந்தாளா என்ற கேள்விக்கு விடை கிடைக்காது அவர்
வாழ்நாள் முழுவதும் முடிவு தெரியாத முடிவை தேடி அலைந்தார். உலகம் இருவரின்
மரணத்தை ஒரு அசம்பாவித விபத்தாக ஏற்றுக் கொண்ட நிலையில், நடந்த
உண்மைகள் உறைந்த போன உண்மைகளாகவே இருக்க சுந்தரம் விரும்பினார்.
Sunday, December 20, 2015
A MIRAGE IN NIAGARA
P. Krishnamoorthy
The
summer on that day was at the peak, and the Niagara Falls was at its best. The
reflection of the sun's rays on the falls was strikingly strong, transforming
it into a silver cascade. The rhythemic thunderous roar of the falls was heard
all over, while the multi colored rainbow at the foot of the falls,
was a scene of nature's serene spleandour. Having been bonded in
the shackles of celibacy for quite long since my adolescence, I felt I was a
total misfit in the thronging crowd of honeymooners there. They were
distinctly different in nationalities, physical features, lingos, etc.
but uniformly happy as they were all away from their mundane routine and
usual abodes. They were in different age groups - the young ones in their
vibrant cheer, the middle aged in an effort to see what they missed so
far, and the ‘senior citizens’ with their nostalgic memories.
Strangely enough, my inner instinct was prophesying that I would be a
beneficiary of an interesting acquaintance on that day. My wishful
interpretation of this premonition was meeting an interesting damsel. As I was
pondering on my strategy to accomplish this into a reality, I could see a
lady's handbag left on a rock near the main falls. I looked around for any
claimant to it; but there was none to claim it. Impelled by another
self-prediction that the handbag would lead me to my ‘dream
damsel’, I picked it up and opened in an effort to identify
the owner. Among the contents, there was an Indian passport, money and a
Broadway Hotel card with the room number on it. On a cursory glance, the
passport revealed the 'single' status of the holder and the photograph in it
evidenced her as a damsel. Coincidentally, her name "Sheila" was my
favourite one too! I thanked the Lord for providing me with the necessary clues
to go about in meeting the new acquaintance.
I did not lose any time in my quest and rushed to the Broadway Hotel. At the
reception, I was given a message that I should call Sheila in her room. I
was astounded at the sudden turn of events.. The puzzle was mainly on how
she knew my name. In fact, I was the one suppose to call her and return the
handbag. Apparently, this might have been a providential arrangement for
a romantic prelude. Perhaps the proverbial saying "marriages are made in
Heaven" was an instant explanation to it. If further developments go well,
I guessed, I would be terminating my terms with the celibacy soon. I called her
through the intercom from the lobby and to my happiness, there was a very sweet
voice that answered my call. "Sheila here!".
.
“I am
Pradeep from the lobby. I got your message through the reception. I believe you
wanted meet me? Since there was a fast flow of words, I ensured that I did
not fumble any of them in my effort to impress her. At that point I felt
that I would be having a tryst with my would be 'life support’.
"Mr. Pradeep, I am coming down to meet you in
the lobby in few minutes. Kindly wait for me"
Her
voice was more of a plea, combined with eagerness to meet me. "I would
certainly be waiting for you.. Please take your time”. I was thrilled to bits
at the very thought that a beauty is going to meet me for the first time in my
life.
As I was preparing myself all out to impress her from my first greeting word, I
saw her coming down in the stairs. I could not take my eyes off from her. She
was incredibly beautiful and placid beyond my imagination. I was reminded of
the historical Helen of Troy; if Niagara would have been a seaport,
her face would have 'launched thousand ships'. In the traditional Indian
hairdo, her round face with proportioned powerful eyes and sharp nose,
was indeed scintillating to the eyes. In the typical Indian
dress of ‘’shalwar kameez’’ she proved that she was not
a victim to the culture conflict. I admired her courage of conviction to retain
her Indian cultural identity even in the western world. In summing up,
she was just a personification of smartness.
"Good
morning!" I initiated the conversation in the best of my voice. After the
reciprocating ritual, she continued "What would you give
me if I return to you something valuable you had left somewhere?" I was
baffled on her offer of returning something to me, when I was suppose to
return to her the handbag.. I could not recollect that I lost
anything. "My reward depends on what you would be returning to me". "Okay.
This was the one you had left in the restaurant this morning". As
she was giving my wallet, she continued "From your hotel card
I found your name and room number “.
How silly it was to expose my carelessness so blatantly to her at our first
meeting when I am suppose to impress her for a long term endearment. What
a shame? Instead of my giving a gift to her, she was demanding a
reward from me. It took me few minutes to get over from this great shock;
but finally I decided to pay her in the same coin. "Till
this minute I did not realise that I lost my wallet. Thanks a million for
restoring it. My reward is ready. It is also very valuable". When
I returned her handbag, I could see her face beamed with surprise. "You
also had left your handbag on the rock near the falls. I picked it up and came
to the hotel to return to you when I got your message to see you. What a
coincidence and similiarity with us. This would be my reward to you".
She thanked me profusely, for, it contained her passport which was more
valuable than anything. Prompted by a sense of rewarding me, she said
"Would you mind joining me for a coffee in the restaurant?". This
spontaneous offer levitated me and I felt it was a reaffirmation of the great
time I was hoping to be with her. This would be a great opportunity for us to
exchange personal details for a better understanding of each other that
would tip the scale in her mind to make a commitment towards me. We
started walking towards the restaurant.
Her demure walking was more captivating in every respect which attracted the
onlookers' admiring eyes as well as spiteful sights. I was certain that
there were both well wishers and ill wishers at my profound privilege of
walking with her in close proximity. After ordering the coffee, we were conversing
on various subjects on this planet – from potatoes to politics,
unrest in Middle East region, earthquake in Japan, Iran’s nuclear issue India’s
phenomenal progress since independence, culture conflicts, Indian traditional
dances, etc.
With my little knowledge and as an ardent admirer of the Indian classical
music and dance, I discussed with her, their impact on the human mind and
body. When she was countering on some points, I could find that she was a
dancer herself before coming to America. "I have been very proud to label my days as a dance artist, as the finest
days of my life" she said.When she discussed the intricacies of the
various forms of Indian classical dance, like the sinuous grace of Manipuri,
the grandeur of Bharata Natyam, the divine intensity of Kathakali, the
seductive Mohiniattam, lively Kuchipudi, I could assess her proficiency in the
highest order, both in knowledge and performance of those arts.
"My fidelity to these great forms of Indian dance was so strong that I
gave my utmost mental concentration and physical exercise. But, even with
my intense practice and performances of these various forms, I never felt I
accomplished the ultimate in them. Still I felt satisfied that I could bring my
body and soul to a natural milieu." In these words, I found
her yearning to finish an incomplete career. With the extensive exchange of
opinions on various subjects including the classical Indian dance, I
started feeling a compatibility between us; I could even say that
there was an agreement on the so called 'personal chemistry' between us. The
constant concentration of her eyes into mine, embarrased me, for,
they were transfixed to a great depth. I could feel a new purpose of life in
her introduction.
"Pradeep! You are very smart and you must be an athlete.You have
maintained your figure just great".With these words, her continued visual
focus towards me guaranteed my wishful thoughts of becoming life pals."Do you take non veg. food?" She was careful in her interrogation as
she thought she was intruding into my personal preferences. “ No way. I
am a strict vegetarian". This instant response from me reflected a gleam
in her face. "Ï hate people who eat meat. Poor birds and animals are
butchered to appease the taste of such people. We still
have not shed our stoneage eating taste”.She must have felt we were on the same
wave length in our food favourites also.
"Unfortunately I could not get any vegetarian food here. Everywhere they
serve only the other type. I manage with my salads". She could understand
my disappointment on this. "I will be preparing some vegetarian food in my
room this evening. I will be delighted if you could join me for dinner at
seven". "I am honoured by your invitation. I deem it as a profound
privilege to join you for the dinner". “Ÿou don’t have to be so
formal” She was too modest. We returned to our rooms after our cordial
and pleasant few hours.
On an analysis of the developments since our meeting in the morning. I
was confident and comfortable at every stage with the pace of events. I could
easily guess a consensus between us on many subjects we had discussed. Hardly
we had a difference on anything. Her interest in me was well expressed
through her eyes; her appreciation of my personality was yet another yardstick
to measure her sincerity in her interest towards me. The parting offer with an
invitation to join her for a diinner was her strategy to avoid a
'open-shut' situation and to continue our understanding each other. She had
cared me so much that I should not be starving for want of something. What more
one could expect to make a final decision? In such a backdrop of
favourable trends, I decided that during our evening rendezvous, I should ask
her interest in becoming a life partner to me. I had all faith in the
providential directive which would evoke a favourable finale. In fact, I was
optimistic that she herself would break the ice on the subject with a straight
'yes' for a life partnership. .
When I looked at my watch, it was only four in the evening and another three
hours to go for the final verdict. I was looking at the Falls through the
window. It was as magnificent as ever with a relentless roar. I started
selecting the dress that I should wear for the evening. My favourite
beige colour T-shirt and blue jeans won the selection, as I always looked
very attractive in them. In short, I was all set
for the deciding rendeavouz. It was just ten minutes for the clock
to strike seven. I decided to go early and wait at her doors so that at sharp
seven, I could press the door bell. This would impress her on my sense of
punctuality and promptness.
It was seven and I pressed her door bell. She immediately opened the
door. Continuing her allegiance to Indian culture, she was dressed in a dark
green saree.. Her facial makeup was more indicative of her meticulous
efforts to appear more smarter than I had seen her earlier in the day.
She greeted me with a good evening and I was ushered to a big couch
there. The colourful presentation and fragrant smell of the
vegetarian dishes assured a delicious treat.. The difussed lighting and
the soft music in the room were in right blend for the evening.
"You are extremely smart in this dress. What you would like to
drink?" she broke our silence with a kudos on my personality.”Just a
coke" was my quick reply. As she was decanting the contents from the coke
bottle to a crystal, there was a spill of the coke on my shirt. She was
profusely apologetic and feeling guilty. She was trying to clean the stain with
a tissue when we had the first physical contact. At that momentary touch, we
peeked each other. I experienced a whole new feeling down my spine and it was
strangely pleasant.
She initiated the conversation on the subject of ‘marriage’ in
life which I thought would be an ideal preface to
propose my offer. She stressed the importance of happy family life
of people for a better and strong society, as the single parent concept or
broken families leave a scar and stigma on them, which, in turn, finally
reflects on the society. She was vehemently arguing on the necessity of mind
tolerance and adaptability for a successful marriage. She was against
aping of the western world in such things when our rich cultural heritage
provided us with moral base. She was totally with me in these
matters, for I believed strongly holding to our cultural convictions.
Interrupting her conversation, she was asking me whether we could further talk
for some more time before retiring for dinner. I could guess
her continued interest to prolong the conversation which obviously was
providing us a forum to exchange our views and understand each other. I
was waiting for her to finish so that I could respond with my support of her
opinion on marriage which would lead me to ask her affirmation on our life
partnership. There was a telephone call which interrupted her elucidation. She picked up the
call and after few minutes, she turned to me and said "Raju would be
coming late. He wanted us to go ahead with the dinner" "Who is Raju?" was my instant interrogation. "Oh! Raju is my husband".
On hearing these words, I was shaken as if there was an earthquake under
my feet, shattering me to pieces. Suddenly I realised that the misleading
element to all the confusion was the entry in her passport as “single” which
prompted me to build an edifice of hope. I wanted to seek a
clarification from her on the disparity. "Your marital status is different as per
passport". “Yes. We got married just a month before and we combined our
honeymoon with his official assignment here. I have to get the passport
amended in my married name”.
Obviously, my obsession for Sheila had blurred my
vision towards reality.. Presumptions prevailed over perceptions.
Delusion was the ultimate name of the game. I consoled myself
that at least the telephone call came to my rescue just in
time, before my initiative to propose her. However much I was trying to
hide my disappointment, my face failed to conceal it. After a
hurried bite of some items of the dinner , I thanked and bid
her farewell.
As I came out and looked outside, the lighted Falls laughed at me and echoed
-- “A mirage in Niagara”. I could feel the shackles of
celibacy embracing me again.
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